I can't karaoke anymore. I've been banned.

Interesting story, One night, back in '82, there I was bored, and washed up in Osaka. Well, I didn't have a penny (in this case, yen) to my name, and I had just broken up with Matsuda Seiko... well, needless to say, I needed a something to either end my life, or to cheer me up. So I found the darkest alley I could, which isn't hard, because despite being so advanced, Osaka has a lot of dark alleys.

Anyway, I'm walking down this alley, and I'm passing a lot of... shady... characters, but no one is mugging me, yelling at me, or trying to intimidate me. Must be the GAIJIN AURA (another story, needless to say, there feared me). So I kept walking down this dark, slightly foggy alleyway, and then I see a glow... a neon glow... in big bold English (?) letters it said "HAPPY SING SING GOODNESS". enticed, I proceeded to enter.

Well, I had never before been to a karaoke bar before, and the sight of so many Japanese business men drunk and trying to sing Hall & Oates baffled me. So, in the need of entertainment, and some raising of spirits, I started drinking sake, and watching Japanese men make fools of themselves.

After a while, I got into it, and drunk enough, I volunteered to go up... I sang Rosanna, by Toto. I was really selling it, I was owning it. I was hitting notes that never before have come to me. I was a natural. As the song eventually ended, and when the lights went down, I saw all 80 or so men... dead, even the bartender.

Needless to say, politicians found out, and moved to make a statue of me, because of my sheer awesomititude. However, the Emperor, in a rare political stance, was offended that "his people have lost their sense of outrage", and pulled some strings to get me banned from karaoke. He almost was able to get me banned Japan, but I used the "Com'on" defense, and saved a little face.

So yeah, me no karaoke, by law.